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Dreams

Just like everyone else in this world I want life to be perfect. Recently I’ve been having dreams of that special person. I guess what I see in that person is everything I want to be too.

Caring
Giving
Happy
Likes to travel
Always smiling
Likes going for romantic walk and picnics by the sea
Adventurous
Active
Likes sitting watching the stars
Not think family are the worst thing in the world.

I’m a real romantic at heart and would love to be spoilt. I donno what I’m talking about. There is so much I want to write so much I wanna say but I can’t for some reason..maybe next time I think of something I’ll write it down and post at the end of the week.

Then you’ll really see how up and down my emotions are

Last weekend was awesome accomplished an awesome costume for an awesome mate, made muffins… I have to admit I was kinda not looking forward to the weekend I just wanted to sleep but I had an amazing time and sooooo glad we met up.
Monday was also awesome, I went climbing for the first time, it was brilliant fun. I was scared shitless but I did it. I’m really bad at it but I did it and that’s all that matters!!!!! I was so pumped with adrenaline I just couldn’t get to sleep.
Tuesday I was happy cos my auntie and uncle were arriving form Malaysia. They are strange butfun. Their plan was delayed and ended up being at the airport from 8pm till 1.30am but that was stansted :p
Wednesday went very much downhill fast, my back started to kill me, and I’ve been in pretty much constant agony since. I went to the doctors and she said I have pleurisy. Been taking pain killers since.
Thursday I just rested
Friday I went to Brighton for the weekend with my parents. I got to meet up with Laura which was amazing, I miss her loads!!!! Did a lot of walking with mum,dad auntie, and uncle, that’s when I got thinking about what I want in life and stuff…. Ahhhhh I donno

Anyway gonna run away and watch some tv or something.

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Welcome back to Livejournal haha

Hey All

I thought i’d post my LJ post here too just incase people can’t read it and because i can :p

“It’s been a while I hope you’re all good.

I’m getting there, i need to work harder at fixing my life but i’m getting there slowly.

I’ve changed my account name back to Aquapixie. I’m not sure why but I was having much more fun back in those days maybe this will help kick start funs. I’ve still got all my old posts and it’s been a laugh looking through them all.

So whats been happening recently? Well not a lot, i’m still working at Kingston Hospital, it’s been about 8 years now, but i’ve only been in the IT department for 3 years, i’m not really enjoying it but i’m also struggling to find a new job, like thousands of other in the world. In case you didn’t already know i’m living in a little flat in kingston with my boyfriend, we have been here for about a year and a half so if you ever wanna visit give me a shout, we live right next to the river so a nice walk to the park is always on the cards.

I’ve been going out a little more than normal. I went to Collectamania Milton Keynes yesterday with Zoe and Melu. It was awesome, i got to meet Anthony Head, Alex Kingston and David Blue, they were all awesome and really friendly. Zoe has some photos on Facebook if you wanna have a look

Zoe helped me sign up for a gym, i’ve not been going as much recently but hopefully i’ll start getting back into it soon. I really need to get some more motivation to do a lot of things. There is so much i want to do but i lack motivation to do anything… sooooo bad.

I haven’t really seen my other friends around the place in a while and i feel terrible. If you are ever about the place let me know. I would love to meet up (thats if i’m not being pathetic and panicking).. Talking of friends…. HAPPY BIRTHDAY for tomorrow Choco I hope you have an amazing day and i hope you had an awesome time at wota xx.

I did get a chance to visit my best friends from uni, Kim and Jon the other day. It was amazing, i miss them so much. We haven’t seen each other in about 2 years but it was like it was only yesterday, we chatted about everything and it was just COOL. I was up in Manchester with Chris to watch Gary Neville’s testimonial. We were in the 3rd row and i swear i could almost touch David Beckam lol.

Other bad things in life at the moment is i am POOR, since moving into this flat i have had no money and now they have increased the rent i have less than no money which is pants. Basically what i want to say is Sorry to anyone who asks me to do anything and i can’t because i just don’t have the funds, The worst part about having no money is that i might not be able to go to Ayacon anymore and i deffo can’t afford to go and see Yossy in France at the end of June ((((

Anyway enough rabbitting from me, i hope to hear from you soon, i’d love to get comments it makes me feel wanted HAHAHAHA :p only joking, it’s nice to hear from you guys whenever wherever :p..

I should really be looking into what more i can do with my life… jobs and courses but i think today i’m going to go back to playing Resident Evil 5 haha

Take Care my lovelies and hopefully i will keep on updating my LJ xxxxx”

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New Year New Me?

Hey all, long time no talk!!!!

I have to admit things this year haven’t been going well, I’m hating my job, I feel bullied and constantly stressed and moody. I’m hoping to get a new job but i just can’t get up the motivation to look, I’m guessing that means i don’t really need it but i so do. I have finally got my MCTS (Microsoft Certified Technical Specialist) so that will get me in the good books of some employees, although i don’t think i want to be in the IT industry anymore. I just don’t know what i want to, i don’t know what i like and i don’t know where i wanna go in life.

The positive aspects of this year so far is Zoe is helping me get fit, we have been going to the gym loads, we are trying to at least go 4 times a week. I have signed up for getting Personal Training too so hopefully i’ll be fit and healthy quicker. I’ve been introduced to Zumba too, it’s AMAZING and so much fun, i’d love to keep this up for as long as possible.

Zoe has also been getting me into actually watching more things, i started watching Supernatural which is AWESOME, Dean is so hot, and also Glee which is fun. She’s been writing a blog called Let Zoe Spoil You you must all go have a look and read some of her reviews, they are awesome.

I want to post this for now i think, i’ll prob try and write something proper tomorrow if i get a chance, i’m going to go and play a little Zumba on my XBox now :p

xxxx

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Whats new today?

Today I went to the doctors to have a follow up appointment, he said i’m not doing too well, i’ve definitely gotten worst than the last time I saw him. One thing the both of us didn’t want to do was get me on Anti Depressants again, but he felt like he didn’t have much of a choice. So yeah, i’m being weened off the Propranolol and put on Citalopram, I really hope they help, i’m not sure what to do anymore.

Anyway enough about me, i thought i’d post some pictures and write about them cos i can ^_^

Piccy Number 1 – This is my avatar. I picked this picture because I think Yossy is amazing and i nearly have an outfit like this. Thats what i’m basing my birthday party on and I want people to see how awesome she is too. I need an Angry…. any volunteers??

Piccy Number 2 – Yossy and her Guitar. As I said Yossy is awesome and has amazing style. She is learning the guitar which is something i’ve always wanted to do, i guess this is a reminder for me every time i look at it to pick up my guitar and have a go. I love Yossy’s fondness for hats, they are cool and suit her so well.

I think eventually when i get a chance and some motivation back, i’ll start to make my Yossy scrap book, i’ve got so much to put in it but just never seem to do anything about it. I’ll take some photos of that too ^_^

Darn… i’m going to have to stop writing again, my food has just arrived.. PIZZZZZZA <3

~*Aqua*~

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ANGRY, just angry with no hANGRY :(

Today has been rather crap, i’m so angry and i don’t know what to do with this anger,

If you’ve seen my facebook, you’ll know why…..

I just wants them to go away now, how much more are they going to put me though before they realise they’ve hurt me, they’ve lied, they’ve taken advantage or me and all i wanted was to be friends!!!!

I’ve never wanted so much to be invisible and just go away, leave… but theres so much I want to do.

I’m starting to hate Kingston more and more each day but there isn’t anywhere else i want to me, i’m starting to hate England and some of the people. I watch things on TV and just think (like everyone else), “If only i could do that”, “if only i could be your friend”, “if only i was in that counrty”, “if only things were different” .

I don’t really know what more to say that won’t make me sound like an emo, annoying cow… but i needed to vent and MY blog was the best place to do it…..

I’ll probably write more in a but my food has arrived and i wanna eat.

~*Aqua*~

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A day in the life of me (Very uninteresting)

Is not so fun but meh

Today I went to work for 8am, sat at my desk for like an hour while reading BT emails, so technical and confusing.

Went for training now on assertive… well obviously that was wasted on me, how am I ever going to get the confidence to say NO if i’m constantly put down and just can’t seem to do anything for myself.

Sat in work for an hour then went for some lunch, Sushi whoooot……

Next went for a moving and handling course which was litterally along the line of this is how you pick up a box with nothing in it and how to pick up paper on a chair… very useful honest :s

That was the end of work, went into town with my cousin and had somthing to eat, came back and watched TV…

THAT IS MY DAY!!!!!!! why why why do i have no motivation to do ANYTHING AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH stressful!!!!!

~*Aqua*~

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So whats this blog all about??

Well to be honest, I just don’t know O.o

I want to have this awesome blog with load of information about stuff, but i just don’t know what to write.

Any ideas would be muchly appreciated. I know it’s meant to be about expressing myself and stuff but i want an aim as well.

As you may all know Yoshizawa Hitomi is my idol so i want this blog to be just as much about her activities as well as mine, whether its as Yossy, Hangry, Gata player etc.

(This post is also to test that RSS feed works :p)

~*Aqua*~